Remember last week when the pretty little liars had Alison DiLaurentis arrested for Mona Vanderwaal's murder? And then they were like "hooray, we captured A!" How adorable. Clearly these poor girls have learned zero lessons from being stalked by a deranged it-girl, because A is still very much around, and s/he's out for blood.

This week, the ladies realize that Detective Holbrock might be helping Ali get her A-game on in jail, and they make it their mission to discover the truth. Eager to find out more? Check out our recap, which we swear is less complicated than actually watching "Pretty Little Liars."

In Which Toby Expects Us To Believe He's A Policeman and Spencer Joins Team Caleb

In case the uniform and sudden interest in giant photographic lenses wasn't a giveaway, Toby Cavanaugh is still a policeman. Which is still hilarious. Toby's job has come in pretty handy (or should we say "job" –– seriously, what does he actually do all day?), and this week he recovers a bloody knife while strolling around Mona's property. Said knife belongs to the Cavanaugh family, and Toby wants to turn it over to the police so they can run prints and hopefully ID Ali as Mona's killer. However, Spencer and Caleb are like "this is the worst idea ever, even worse than the time you whittled a rocking chair" (in so many words) and want to destroy the knife so A can't get his/her mitts on it.

Obviously, this leads to Toby having a mini-breakdown about policeman ethics, which puts major pressure on his relationship with Spencer. Ultimately, she decides to betray Toby's trust and sneak into the woods to steal the knife with Caleb, who intends to melt it in a kiln. Of course, Caleb gets himself locked in the kiln and almost burns to death, so ya know. The usual.

In Which Ali Mopes In Prison, Ezra Is The Worst Boss Ever, and Ms. Marin Makes An Unlikely Friend

Wondering how Ali's spending her time in prison? Aside from wearing a jaunty orange jumpsuit, she whiles away her day feeling sorry for herself, getting her hair blown-out (it looks really good, just saying) and trying to convince her former friends that she's innocent. Ali even tells Hanna that she has an alibi for Mona's death –– she was busy being stood up by her old enemy Cyrus Petrillo! But does Hanna believe her? Not a chance.

In other news, it appears as though Ezra's decided that he's bored with his current pastime of stalking teenagers, and has opened a local book store / coffee shop. This makes him Emily's boss, which is all kinds of awkward –– especially when he hires a girl named Talia to replace her as a caterer for opening night. Poor Emily just wants to earn enough money to buy plane tickets to see Paige, and it's like get your act together Ezra, you're literally a millionaire. Buy this poor girl her air fare!

Meanwhile, Hanna's mom, Mrs. Marin has started working with Jason DiLaurentis, which is a slightly awkward situation for all parties involved –– especially because Jason and Mrs. Marin sleep together and Hanna finds them.

Annnnnd moving right along....

In Which Aria Puts Her Relationship In Jeopardy and Hanna's Teddy Bear Gets Disemboweled In A Trailer Park

Apparently there is life after Rosewood, and the pretty little liars are in the midst of college applications! The problem? Aria hasn't gotten into any schools, and to make matters worse Ezra's ex-girlfriend, Jackie, works in admissions at the only college she gets wait-listed at. In an act of pure desperation, Aria writes Jackie a letter saying that her relationship with Ezra ruined her life, and shockingly it does the trick. Jackie pities Aria and accepts her application, but we have a feeling it won't be too long before A plants a copy of her letter on Ezra...in fact Aria finds a fragment of the letter at the end of this episode...

So, what's Hanna up to while her friends repeatedly get attacked by A? This unlikely brainiac goes out of town to visit a school, and ends up wandering to a creepy trailer park where she stares in horror at what appears to a member of Duck Dynasty skinning a cat (the verdict's still out). Turns out Hanna's visiting Detective Holbrook's family home because he was visiting his sick dad –– however, Papa Holbrook leers at Hanna and says that his son hasn't been seen or heard from in weeks. Oh, and after this super-creepy exchange, Hanna strolls back to her car only to discover that her stuffed teddy bear has been filled with bloody organs. So...all in all a great night!

And now, the moment you've been waiting for: It's time for Ezra's opening gala, a fabulous soiree in which Spencer eats terrible empanadas and makes friends with a guy named Johnny Raymond (who's going to be living in her backyard). Good times! Also of note: Emily having an emotional breakdown about how Paige is ignoring her calls, and Spencer having an emotional breakdown about how Toby doesn't listen to her. So many emotions, so little time.

And now, for some burning questions. Where do we start?

1. Why is Paige ignoring Emily? Did they break up and forget to tell us?
2. Is Detective Holbrook really working for Ali? And if he isn't, where was he during his so-called "trip to see his dad"?
3. Will Spencer and Toby break up now that he's a policeman? Considering that two of Spencer's best friends are murderers, he should probably watch himself.
4. Is Ali telling the truth about her alibi, or is this another one of her lies?
5. Why did Mona's murderer use a knife from Toby's cabin –– could someone in his family be the killer?