9 Times 'Game of Thrones' Messed Us Up for Life
WARNING: Spoilers ahead! HBO’s “Game of Thrones” might compel millions of viewers to tune in each week, but it’s not exactly the most pleasant TV experience. The show is filled with torture, violence, and ice zombies. Here are nine times our favorite show was pure nightmare fuel.
The White Walker Girl (Season 1)
The very first episode of the series gave us a taste of the White Walkers and the threat they pose. There’s something intensely creepy about seeing a young girl devouring human flesh and sending grown, armed men fleeing in terror.
The Shadow Baby (Season 2)
How can one woman defeat a massive army on her own? If you’re the mysterious witch Melisandre, all you have to do is weave a little magic (courtesy of the Lord of Light) and give birth to a shadow demon that feasts on the blood of kings like its Gerber. This easily qualifies as one of the most unsettling scenes of childbirth in the history of ever. *rocks back and forth under the shower, crying...
Joffrey’s Death Rattle (Season 4)
It's okay to clap at this D-bag's demise. His final episode in Season Four offered one of those rare situations on this show where a character got exactly the death they deserved. But as much as we had grown to despise the spoiled, vindictive Joffrey, it was still hard to watch as King Asshat slowly spasmed and turned purple before finally gasping his last, wheezy breath. Good riddance.
The Battle of Hardhome (Season 5)
This battle features several moments full of weapons-grade Nooooooope. The defining moment, though, is when Jon Snow and his comrades fought a losing battle to save a Wildling village from an army of White Walkers. As epic as this sequence was, it ended on a profoundly depressing note -- with Jon having a "Come at me, bro!" staring contest with the Night’s King, a silent enemy who merely raised his arms and resurrected the dead carpeting the ground, turning them into his newest soldiers. The pending war ain't gonna end well.
That Baby Sacrifice (Season 4)
As much as we love this show, the people that come up with this stuff are just a tad on the eff'd up side. In a show full of next-level terrible villains, the hermit Craster is among the very worst. Incest and rape are just two of his many crimes. But this guy's worst act is his habit of sacrificing his infant sons to the White Walkers -- in exchange for continued survival beyond the Wall. Told you -- it's messed up.
Arya Loses Her Sight (Season 5)
First rule of worshiping the Many-Faced God, Arya: Don't steal any faces from his shrine of visages! Our favorite Stark learned this lesson the hard way, when she pulled a "Face/Off" to assassinate Ser Meryn Trant. Her punishment is worse than her her crime: She was blinded and left with this scary white stuff for eyes.
RIP, Oberyn (Season 4)
Fans loved the charismatic Oberyn Martell way back in Season Four. So, naturally, the show was gonna kill him because we can't have nice things. His revenge-fueled final brawl was destined to yield a terrible fate. And by "terrible fate," we mean The Mountain using his monster hands to turn Oberyn's head into Sloppy Joe.
The Death of Shireen (Season 5)
Stannis Baratheon is Westeros for "a**hole." Fans thought he might be the guy to unite the Seven Kingdoms, but that dream ended in tears and flames in the penultimate chapter of Season Five, as he reluctantly agreed to burn his daughter Shireen at the stake in order to appease the Lord of Light. Only a cold-hearted you-know-what could stand there and do nothing as his daughter screamed in agony, or when her mother broke down after realizing the terrible, tragic mistake she was complicit in making.
The Red Wedding (Season 3)
You were expecting something else? We wish there was something less disturbing and so full of wrong than the series' most infamous murder-death-kill. Thanks to this episode, we’ll forever be on our guard when we attend weddings. Aaaaand now we return to rocking back and forth under the shower.